khAi

2009-01-10T20:50:00.002+08:00

share my life.
take me for what i am.
i was blown away, that u took a away all tat i can do without.
i cant forget. cos i went too deep.

im done but i just cant forget.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

apart that, waiting to grab pics of events. those buggers claim to be too busy to upload them. grrr!!!

so..

2008-12-27T17:59:00.000+08:00

*
ps. darling khai, i miss you dearly.

how just small arguments bring us apart.

just how powerful pain can be to tear our bond further.

just how weak ur love is now just because of this - the old issue.

i'm waiting for ur call, baby.

waiting for the verdict.

i'm waiting for ur answer, khai.

if i can see - the love - if you're gonna give.
*

*chucks*
again.. yeah.. i do miss her. but.....
i... jus cant believe this shit actually happen to me.
i cant cry tho. but the willingness to triage the heartbreak is crippling.
so hard to stand up whenever this THOUGHT comes to mind.
why it came i dun fucking understand why.
jus so hard to accept "to let go".
because i poured into you.
those words above, they tell me u do dire the affection.

sighs.

and im shaking my head so hard,
thinking:
" why sia? "

lol.. this thing acts like a pop-up window in my head.

afterlife. a song

2008-12-24T17:33:00.000+08:00

i gave u my hand but realise tat u just wanna say goodbye.
i dun understand that u had to leave and carry on from there.
leaving me on my own.

still,
always i thought, give me that chance to be that person i wanna be.
broken, i dun wanna be. but You, God, have to give me that frenetic cadence.
all mauled i am, but i dun wanna be. so this bile that glitch in me shall perpetually vanish.

then i dont wanna belong here, cos im moving on now, dear. escape from this afterlife.
cause this time im right to move on and on, far away from u.
fuck that that im against you but SURELY I'LL MISS YOU.
this place filled with melancholy and malady, peace and light.

still i hope you might,
take me back inside,
when the time is right.

i laugh at the subject that i miss you. when my heart is filled with lies and seduction.
but this morbid episode, i want you to foresee. mayb those recesses in your heart might fill me in again.

haha.
crap sia, khAi.
sometimes u gotta learn that compassionate leads to ur grave.
so, so long, motherfucka!

*sometimes i hope u die, bitch.
he he hee. so, babies... whyy soo serious...?*

think the why..

2008-12-21T02:23:00.000+08:00

i came to think of why i do think..
and it struck me that sometimes it drives me nuts.
dont understand the part where emotions get involve with the thoughts i have.
in trade, mindless propaganda starts to orbit. now... that's when someone goes from conscious, to haywire.

i dont really agree to what i see these recent times. hating to call it 'the pot calling the kettle black'.
i gave it up, time before and time again. but before it was like.. remorse. but now, probable perpetual vile might occur. scary? no. pretty much disgust in the human mind.

one thing: the undercurrent. the unseen probable uncouth upsetting undercurrent in us. all of us.
no, u dun realise it actually happens. the irony is it creates the disbelief to one's own opinion of virtue. really.. now this is scary. because why? because this is commonly known as the 'true colors' ... yes..

put it this way. one moment u see him/her dying to brush ur hair back trying to make u feel comfortable but the next moment u see him/her swearing back at u because u did something unreliant. see, this is the part where undercurrents may not turn inside out, instead surface as calm currents like u normally see by Marina Bay. *lol!* this intents the accumulation of backstabbing thoughts which usually do occur in young minds like you, maybe me. =P

the one thing i become oblivious to is the pace and time taken for that 'undercurrent' to start pouring out obviously! like maybe haemorrhaging!! and this kinda things can actually happen - from that person next to u! - "ur love, ur heartthrob, ur whatever-mushy-shit-u-wanna-call-it".. *and that tag lights up on ur forehead: 'what?!' *-- yeah.. : scorn. read it back again to understand.

well here.. i dun wanna sound so blabberish. but look at ^yourself^ in "the eyes".. if u really have the emotions and call them names like love - to love, care - to care, sad, happiness, joy, or whatever.. .., then mayb u should start thinking if such poignant emotions is for u to feel from a foreign source.

see.. since that night, i see the repetition of me suing ~~her~~ conscience.
and thus: ~~her~~ profound haughtiness..
hence: the preempt notoriety amongst fellow peers.
ergo: my own early confusion.

now i sing songs, lyricist to the melodies, instrumenting the scores.
that word 'undercurrent' made a why, seemingly i thought.
and i stool staring back at my silhouette on e floor......

where was i when it mattered. what was i when it mattered. fuck it, bitch. what matters to that mind? so much for believing it, my efforts dont even move a notch; to you? Fuck you. im happy now. with my own. *facades from your undercurrents*

--" gosh__:

jewel, a family is

2008-12-13T15:04:00.000+08:00

still...

maybe this is my fate.
this is the test for me and my family.
it can't be changed.
it's written to happen. all we can do is pray.

looking at my mother, i see the pain in her eyes.
i feel the hurt she's trying to hide from her children.
her sacrifice wasn't appreciated. her sacrifice gone to nothing.
she tried so very hard to hold back the tears.
but she couldn't hide it from me.
i knew, i felt, and her tears began rolling down.

without a sign of remorse.
was it pride or was it arrogance.
making it seem like it was nothing.
just a little appreciation was enough to make it better.
make this misery a blessing for the family.
make a woman feel she's making a difference.

from a boy, to a teenager, now an adult.
i've went through this for 10 years.
i realise, only us can make this stop ourselves.
but when?

-- "quoted..

i hit it.. twice!

2008-12-06T17:00:00.000+08:00

i got away..
going on around to find myself some good. i was alrdy thinking back time and that hey i should let me have me some 'me' time.. saw me: a ride.

boozing. there, drooling.
a scent it came. i hit it, first time. and there we were, hooked.

many what happened. release of fervent angst or sweet affections, or lust.
i spent myself. cos i wont delineate myself weak in recuperation.
evenly i rally to my 'wants'.. and the gambit i play with sly affection.

i may miss you, but i'll kill the keen rue which u remind me of.

still i stray, reeling into the haze i dreamt. *snarls*
and there she was, to my serendipity.
and boy, every kiss blinded to sins of my pasts. *chuckles*

" first time it was funny. the second:
she was crazy.. her pinky drooled her white stuffs. and she liked to laugh. oh!"
*i want it again, please!*

Diena..

2008-11-22T09:22:00.000+08:00

" Well all I really wanna do is love you.
A kind much closer than friends use.
But I still can't say it after all we've been through.
And all I really want to do is to feel you. "

And Diena you know..
if u meant tat, for me?
all i wanna do is feel it too..
I still do, baby.

" waiting for e day tat i'll call u, 'Love'.. "

one thought.
if u knew my sacrifices, and appreciate my love,
we'd still be together.
I want a healthy relationship, b..
my last effort was to sign a 10year bond in the SAF.
but i didnt get full approval. and somehow it posed as if im worthless.
tell me, baby, u didnt leave me for nothing, honestly..
pretty much as me n u are maturing, u talked about marriage, something
way far beyond time which we can use to build our home for.
25? 26? 27?
i ORD wen im 21. i failed to assure u wen my bond didnt get full approval, if u realised.
not tat i didnt try, b.. it was my good deed to me. to my family at least. and further: us..
but..... nothing gained :
and i lost my deepest love.
Diena. I love you, if you need to noe.
so deep my love is, i cant bear when u left me hanging jus like tat.
and for wat?...

till the day, i'll call u 'Love' again - till forever.
*hugs and kisses for you, Diena*

my bad..

2008-10-24T17:56:00.000+08:00

so much for i wat believed in.
i now know that its not enough.
i feel for wat i feel. and while it last, i didnt noe it would.
and now it's broken. i grieve till no end.
but why? i must ask myself. i hadnt been much there.
bcos i didnt put in wat i had to.
now tat she's gone, for wat i realised i should hav done better,
it's too late. these are just words.

Nur Diena Binte Zakaria.
You make me realise. But you are no longer here.
I pray for us again..
I pray.
And i pray..
Thank You, dear love.

why i cry...

2008-06-04T21:13:00.000+08:00

Angel eyes.
I can't help but stare at those angel eyes
When you look back at me
There it goes - with your smile
My heart beguiles

And everytime i see you smile
Can't help but it touches me everytime
Not once it fails
And there you go - you smile
My heart beguiles

Once before, wise.
To believe to Love is to shine
Your eyes your smile i rely
In token that my heart beguiles
For me and you -
To shine...

Lookin back and it's clear to see
What it is that's killing me
Through the eyes of the one i hold
Surface the venge that i once let go
While constantly it burns me
A face -
Detest of the love that blessed us both

The tie, to be true
When we open our eyes and realize it's home
To condone what lies we have done
Like to scream for the light of the sun
For the Love that blessed us both...

And why i cry

Underneath there lies

What i trust to believe

-----+-<3

the Love of my life...

<3<3<3

nothing else..

2008-05-04T23:38:00.000+08:00

I MISS YOU, DIENA..

an effort for memories.. : khAi

2008-05-04T00:47:00.000+08:00

some pics..

some memories..

khai and diena..

i miss you, Diena... -----+--<33

i miss you... -------+--<33

hope..

2008-05-01T03:46:00.000+08:00

u told me tat u're hopeful.

but u're still afraid.

Diena, i want to start anew..

let us forget the past,

let us breathe - together..

let us feel like we use to feel,

like we wanna feel..

all im hoping is that my wish for us to start anew,

becomes a reality...

i Love you, Diena.

i believe i still do..

come back k, syg..

and together we can embrace a new future..

and never be afraid again.. never..

baby, i miss you..

too much for me to help myself..

i hope u hear my cries at night,

when i whisper to ur stolen heart,

I love you, baby..

i still do..

like butterflies, u are beautiful..

with wings so colourful..

i'll let u fly to see the world,

and let u feel the morning sun..

and u'll come back into my arms,

and together we'll be like the tongue and sour plums..

pahit madu akan kita lalui bersama..

tangis dan gurau akan kita kongsi bersama..

Khai rindukan mu, Diena sayang..

Khai amat mencintaimu..

hanya ku harap...

kau kan kembali....

wooooh..

2008-04-28T14:45:00.000+08:00

had an outing with the girlfrens..

hehe.. haha..

and there was me, suzy, katie and zurin. it was great..

we went makan at teh tarik.. and it was my treat..

well... it was great.. yes i said it alr.. it was fun..

we shared alot.. me n suzy we can relate much cos of wat we're goin thru..

and it helps.. the girlfrens are jus great la.. im so looking forward to another outing..

i am noe! =D

well then im here.

alone yet dying to love her.

ur gone for the moment,

but,

Diena, i wish u are here.

it was full moon,

but i had no joy to steer,

no love to share,

and all i need was,

Diena, i wish u were there.

the lonely nights i had to bear.

on my bed, missing u and i would tear.

i prayed for all these to clear,

and for you,

Diena, to be here.

everytime i feel and think of you,

i never think i ever wanna leave you.

i pray and hope tat wat i wish will come true;

and tat is,

Diena, i wanna love you.

i fell to my knees,

i fell on my face.

Girl dont leave me;

it is us tat i want to embrace.

Diena... I love you.

I belive i still do.

And i miss you.

Please.

My heart longs for yours.

For the warmth tat we used to share.

come back, please..

i need you..

ohh Diena..

2008-04-24T14:51:00.000+08:00

diena...

My love, Diena..
You're gone. And i cant believe it.
It seemed too easy for u to let me go.
And i dont understand tat.
It takes me far, far to think of what i actually mean to u.
And for u to let me go jus like tat, it seemed 'us' before,
was like nothing.
Is your heart really tat pure?
Do you really believe wat it is -- To Love.. ? Do you?

it was like hell..

i cant take u off my mind.

even tho we agreed to be frens,

u insisted on being cold towards me.

even then.

i told u..

to look deep down inside,

to feel wat u really wanna feel,

but u cant.

moreover,

the presence of another guy who's making u feel good,

and ur resistance to understand me,

it all puts to whether u actually really love me.

or maybe i jus dun understand..

i know u dun wanna force it.

but u must realise tat hatred feeling u have on me.

u cant even take it if it means to look into ur heart,

just for a moment!

i dun wanna say this yet, but i must.

i still love you. even if trust is not much there.

but i wanna do it again.

i want 'us'.. like before..

don't u want it? do u even feel like i actually existed in u?

atau u memang senang nk tukar perasaan?

hati yg tak setia...??

yea.. i've been bad..

but havent u?

it's all wrong.. but i wanna make it right..

dun tell me im selfish,

cos u may be too..

u refuse me too..

u came upon another feeling,

from which it comes from another person,

and u refuse me..

pure? or is it not?

i dun understand..

whatever i am to u..

i wanna know..

if 'us' actually existed..

if tat relationship actually proved us how much each of us mean to each other.

i cant forget u.

cos ur my memory..

and maybe tat u dont understand.

maybe u'll realise and u come back..

or maybe ur jus me..

selfish and hard-hearted..

Diena.

I Loved You.

ohhh...

2008-04-17T02:09:00.000+08:00

Diena..

i miss you..

and im sorry...

let me be in u..
please.. please.. if i must..

i'll beg...

Diena..

2008-04-10T16:38:00.000+08:00

tears of which drips the heartaches.

Diena - depicted amongst white.

dilemma.

i cant leave. yet doubting to stay.

bleed. dilapidate. misfit. astray.

to u, my bliss,

im failing to choose and but i pray.

to feed my pain?

to Love, let alone to trust.

for bliss then may lust.

to say u did best, i but say not.

feed my pain, turn to hurt,

harden my hard-heart.

deeply i say, u weren't trying.

i didnt feel then affection.

i didnt feel then infatuation.

i didnt feel then, obsession.

and before.

we started falling in love; and i

never thought or speak of goodbye.

but this Love is a crazy thing.

and Once this impregnable infatuation pry,

then i never thought i could be so weak,

weak enough to cry.

it was as if they were all lies.

over a new leaf but i deny.

infatuation; and i deny.

u didnt crawl. u didnt creep.

i felt nothing. but i felt lies.

i prayed. i prayed. and i prayed.

for happiness ontouched by any past.

but i cant seem to pull it last.

and now the thought of 'staying' is lost?

Diena. I hope u realise. I told u before. it wasnt as if u didnt hear me. i love u. but was i ever loved? until the point when my affection changed to else, did u realise u haven tried enough? i loved u. too much to believe u would ever lie. to feel and yet history repeats. u cant even fight me when i said u lied.. i wanted u to be mine. i wanted to feel tat u are mine. i damn wanted to feel it. but u didnt give it to me. and i told u so.

i couldnt help but to brush those memories everytime a speck of thought of loving a person comes to mind. i couldnt help but to cry. why? diena u didnt understand how i felt. and u noe i wanted more. but i cant believe it to turn out this way. i gave u my love. and u gave me yours - stained. and u didnt understand tat i loved u the most. or maybe u did. but was i ever blessed wit the same feeling? remember how it was to feel to be loved? to feel to be treated, to be loved, to be understood? how deep u can feel my love is for u? how much i would dare and care for u?

but have u thought of how i felt? how i would feel to be loved by you? u might have thought khai must be missing me. how then should i make it up for him so to spend that much quality time, to let him feel how much i love him. u tried, honey. u tried. but im hard. and u failed. however me, i didnt fail u - for this reason.

Diena. i hope u do realise wat u mean to me.

and wat i mean to u.

but u should have known, the span it may die.

and u would have been ripe,

ripe for the love you could have had from me,

ripe for the love u deserved from me,

until we end..

i really loved you, Diena..

hmm..

2008-03-18T21:21:00.000+08:00

well..

jus tried to revamp my blog..

didnt have much time to play..

so.. had to change it back to original..

till then..

2008-01-03T06:00:00.000+08:00

2008.. welcome..
whilst 2007.. goodbye...

the very moment it struck i could feel the reminiscence of whatever..
whatever that may come into wat seemed like my supposed-to-be joyful life.
from tat i draw the perceptions of dreams to my adequate being..
this new year for which i hope could bring me yet intimate memories levishing into thy existence.

my hopes for my dream deep wells to accomplish..
my hope is to seek the most discerning trusts among one and thou le loved one. <3
my hope..
for all tat has its significance to my self-righteous existence fulfilled..

<3 <3 <3 .... without u darling it may darken. but believe tat your existence is very much appreciated. nevermind the fading, as long as you, my love, cherish each heartful moment. <3 <3 <3

i have loved you.
yet for the many reasons i may doubt,
; you'r mine till it ends..

hmmm..

2007-10-04T17:35:00.000+08:00

saKhai..^^

Ever felt away with me

Just once that all I need

Entwined in finding you one day

Ever felt away without me

My love, it lies so deep

Ever dream of me

Would you do it with me

Heal the scars and change the stars

Would you do it for me

Turn loose the heaven within

I'd take you away

Castaway on a lonely day

Bosom for a teary cheek

My song can but borrow your grace

Come out, come out wherever you are

So lost in your sea

Give in, give in for my touch

For my taste for my lust

Your beauty cascaded on me

In this white night fantasy"

All I ever craved were the two dreams I shared with you.

One I now have, will the other one ever dream remain.

For yours I truly wish to be."

------------------------------------------------------

beneath the clouds dire the hearts of human

to righteous of virtue and sin.

to live in most desire.

in deep mournings, thy swear ::

*-- If I am unforgiven;thus,I shall not be forgiving.For I swore, that I shall despise of you,and then will I incise you with the entrails of Vengeance. --*

done..

2007-09-09T17:05:00.000+08:00

well... for so long it's been..
till now im done..

gaawwwd..
working life totally suk.. it all matters if u make a choice..

freed yet restless. with a choice to make change.
with love, curiosity, thus insecurties so relentess; feared damed..
to see where the angels lie, thy must be fair. In divident to virtue and sin.
yes i dream to wake high walls; but the art must be potent..
dreams of caliber in deep wells, i yearn for the name among the heavens.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

the question asked.
i cant explain..
i nvr asked for.. nobody asks for.. but still it come again, yet again.... yet again..
i was young.. i wanted freedom.. i wanted all my way..
now i realise.. all for which i wish to sleep in, hindrance is inevitable.. but all must be run..
no matter how easy or how hard things can get, u still gotta move on.. no matter wat... tat's life..
i've been so long enduring little little misfits.. but all tat is is part of the journey.. to which i get tat name - among the heavens ..

Baby.... I wanna live my dreams..
But i'll need..

-----+-<3 You
--------+--<33 I love You...

...man.. make me laugh!!

2007-07-04T16:40:00.000+08:00

BACK!!!

guys...

WATCH THIS!!!

http://www.nothingtoxic.com/media/1153394701/Big_Pansy_Screams_Over_a_Cock_Roach

little too much..

2007-05-07T16:04:00.000+08:00

i was before, holding up my walls so high
you and i, we started falling in love; and i
thought of you to be with till the end of time,
and never, ever would i think or speak of goodbye.
but love makes people do stupid things,
and once this impregnable infatuation, pry
then i never thought i could be so weak,
weak enough to cry.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

baby, i noe its hard. im not easy myself all the time. my problems, paranoia, fear, they come and interfere.. i hope u noe - and u noe urself - that, before us, u have felt wats like to feel miserable inside u bcos u noe u wen u love someone, it would take anything to heal, to forget, and to love again.. but as for me, tat whole thing was but far long ago.. for years i waited for someone tat could levish pebbles of beau into my heart.. for long tat i waited - until i found you... and i noe, this time, i gotta be ready for the future.. i was young, still am young, and still learning of what's reality's gonna be when im finally tested and opened to it.. now tat im with u, my loved one, just about anything can happen.. bcos it means Love. and Love makes ppl do stupid things.. but tat aint awfully true, cos if a knot is entirely secured, no force can untie it.. thus the deep feeling, affection, romance, belonging, Love, all can but stop any wave of negativity if the devil of cupid tries to point a poisoned arrow into our relationship.. but wat the heck, we're both humans.. we make mistakes.. tats where we - people - are like teabags, put into hot water to test how good they are.. hence the essay of patience.. but nonetheless, if one forgo with trust, and echoes with angst, definitely a love's tie is broken.. definitely..

baby.. i need to bring myself up whenever i fall.. but if i fall too hard, i will need you.. these problems they batter me.. they impulse on my being.. at times, they hurt; and they hurt bad.. its not like i cant understand how i will affect u bcos of my own situation... but i always try and do myself good - at least - and at least, i wont affect u.. but u noe, sometimes, u get into trouble; big time.. and ur affected inside u.. and u try to bring all this shit out, away from u..as far away as possible.. u prevail at times, but not all the time.. so u'll end up feeling all so grievous and all so shitty... and all fucked shit orbits in ur mind.. u become quiet.. u keep urself from others.. because u try not to affect them.. but im no saint.. i have my own weaknesses.. i hurt myself, and sometimes.. i hurt others around me too.. and cause unnecessary stupid things to happen.. i jus feel so fukkin sorry because i jus cant stop myself from hurting u sometimes, baby.. im so sorry..

pls bring back the times wen i hold u in my arms..
wen i feel the warmth and affection u give to me..
i need myself to deal with my own negativity..
and i'll need you to bring life into me wenever im down..

pls dun think tat im too bz of my own..
u should noe tat im all into u..
but i need to work things out for my own future..

one thing's for sure..
I will never leave you all alone..
Not a moment for u to think tat im against you..
And for every negation done, im there to condone, to forgive all of you..
For you, baby..

And i want you to know..
That i..
will always..

Love you..

______________Live this heart for me, baby.. <3 <3 <3
______________I give my heart to you.. <3 <3 <3

turning sick..

2007-05-05T21:12:00.000+08:00

feeling ill...
feeling ill in me..

this whole thing being 18, i just cant believe to wat followed it..
im like, 1mth 2wk after 18.. but i dun feel 'that' 18.. u get wat i mean? i got an early curfew, not allowed to finish up on my projects till late at night.. only times i get to stay out at night is if i were to have like a gathering or chalet or something like tat... it feels mutilated... it feels shitty.. it never feels good..
this thing's been done on me like i've done some bad mistakes and to have it put a ' "Your eldest brother is not good as a son in the family" ' sign on their(my parents) forehead.. f***!!!

im not saying im all good, u noe.. but at least scrutiny will help tat I AM NOT - like a black sheep... its never good to me... though the only thing im staying is tat at least money - or i would say, allowance - is given to me... tats good enough.. but nonetheless, curfew jus sux.. i meant an EARLY curfew..im not gonna mention the time... i tried...i tried to be home early... heck even take breaks to go home, do chores and go out again..

dad's seldom home, mom's a pain in the ass to dad, dad's home for the 2 youngest kids, those 2 girls(the young ones) are but lazy scum bags.. well i would say tat... FUCKING LAZY SCUM BAGS!!! dad's not compromising to look into this matter - tat those 2 aren't doing a shit in the house, heck to even say contribute -, and well.. im like scapegoats to a messy and ' unattended' home.. dad's givin excuse he's out to 'find food' for the family.. well... no shit.. to me, an "ingenious" excuse - cos im not like a farking retard to just stay home and do the fucking chores!! all it takes is for dad to jus say something like ' i can do all the chores - alone - , but why whould i? tats y i want u to be home, take supervision ur siblings and attend to the house. dun be like ur mum.. ' ...

u noe how tat feel? wen he say those kinda things..
its jus... its jus prejudice.. its jus fukkin' vengeance.. retribution.. hatred.. HATRED...

sighhh.... im all left alone in my own time... to do wat i can and wat i want.. deliverance of misbehaviour or rule-breaking will just blow me off the cliff... why? dad's gonna get mad, gonna take shit away from me.. and im gonna be like.....grounded.. friggin ground rules... -- may i hurtle in time to annihilate the founder of 'grounding kids'..

arghhh!! im all battered now... im scarred for my own mistakes.. im exaggerated for my misconceptions to think of wat is wrong or right...
i wanna live free.. at least to have my own time.. and then tat's wat will able me to compromise, contribute, congregate and embrace bliss with my (own) loved ones.. im not a kid.. pls..

is all this a lie to beshadow a 'upcoming surprise' in future?

a guise to restrain happiness to come in future?

or is it plainless travail which bestows over my lifeline..?

all but...

all mauled, i am. though, may love conciliate this bitterness of man i've become.

..hmmm

2007-05-03T21:23:00.000+08:00

how's life been up here..
been good..been laughing...been practically enjoying life...
realising tat life is but short, education is after all -in singapore- the -so called- most important 'subject'. no edu, no future.. the thing is, an academically thriven person is very likely to 'survive'; well, tat whole term is all but in all our parents' minds... isn't it? (-.-)

forget about tat for awhile.. tis time, me blogging isn't gonna be all poetic.. well at least i have to prove myself i can write some shit to fill up m space in this blog...well.. since its a blog, watever goes into 'tat' space will be nonetheless viewed by - well... - many others... so, nonsense is not very much tolerated by readers...

hmmz... wats it like? like wats in for me now?

hoping to read stories... u ppl... -.-

im blabbing now..

well...enrolled for bike license.. progressing pretty well but did some 'fatal' mistakes... now at prac. lesson 5..
tmr, RTT... argh!!! all the best to me... and yea.. i watched Wild Hogs recently, and it kinda blow me off.. Well at least i hope tat tat show could open SGeans eyes to those kind of bikes played by Woody, Doug, Dudley, and Bobby in Wild Hogs.. those Harley types just dont fail to blow the shit out off me wen a rider just drag the throttle and speed off!! dang! i just love the sound of it.. wait... u readers noe wat im talking about rite? T_T i hope u do... thinking of em bikes, it'll take me some effort to work for it.. at least for now all i can think of getting is a SP - Class 2B is up to 200cc la... as for me - a first time to be rider -, i'd be dreaming to ride on my own bike.. well at least cos im a first timer... MY OWN BIKE!! -.- im sick!

this whole blogging thing jus dun fit me... i'd prefer to write lil poems so at least my blabbering like tis wont effectively make ppl think im kinda ' can blog for nuts ' person... lol?

till then...

bubbye.......

___:: saKhai

no dead cannot rise again..

2007-04-08T21:33:00.000+08:00

__saKhai::

for a trust that once rang so true,

but was shatted,

for another chance its has to be earned,

not cheaply given or taken.

for long, the invincible trust lived,

alive with but evitable betrayals,

eventually, the span it dies,

now shall be poised with affection - yet again.

there are no dead that cannot live again.

even those long buried shall well be resurrected in holy plains.

To you, my Love, i shall arise to feel both love and pain,

rising up to belief, trust, love, affection, romance.

To the well of sin, I swear for Love and Vengeance.

tragedy..

2007-03-21T16:18:00.000+08:00

it happened...

.eye for an eye.

I loved you, and i loved you most.
I made my choice, but you would not make yours.
In some heartbreak, forgiven but not forgotten,
As what is lost no change of heart restores.
I love you still, and keep thinking of you
With the bitterness of betray, no words describe a poisonous decay.
This, too, will pass, I know, and time renew
The innocence one needs to love, and yet . . .
You were my once, never the last,
I solemnly pray for happiness untouched by any past.
Whatever love comes next, comes with the stain
Of knowing well the strength of this love will be tested.
My love! I hope you realise you have to prove and to be
Ripe for the love you could have had from me.

the calamity of betrayable trust__

dang...its been long..

2007-03-21T15:50:00.000+08:00

saKhai..

back..

damn...

its been long...

i hope tis time i wont stay out too long..

haha..

hey my blog!

i miss u..

2006-12-02T23:09:00.000+08:00

khai:..

khai..

please realise..

this life i can make it right

like right now im still in able

please i wanna do wat i may

i wan to be wat i wana be

but am i doin it right?

this tie,

why the restless nights,

and the mean arguments,

all unnecessary.

is it me?

seems to me; it is.

worries are there so obvious

but why bring those negations?

argh!

ur worries.

my worries.

why.

why..

why.....

and for mine its the cause

now im responsible to correct

all that im wrong for.

Baby..

I really miss you.

tis graving solemnity..

2006-11-26T17:29:00.000+08:00

__khairul::

grieving

in doubt

not helpless

not afraid

.............. ............... ...............

from the time this

came

and many of all hopes

not crushed

just faint.

i came as an infant

yes,with all those hopes.

and i grew

and as i..

start my path;

i drew.

misunderstandings?

ego?

stubborn?

selfish?

arrggh!!!

it came to me

and as far,soon

as neglect.

from this neglect

my being,and my loved ones,

we become the formless ones

crying maybe each day;

at heart tearing each night.

why..?

i dun understand

all i pray for;

forgiveness- for these souls

forgiveness- for the children

forgiveness- for me

sadness..

anger..

doubts..

i dun wanna live this way

not with one

not with only one

but..

Both......

I love you.

I love you all.

I love you.

Baby,i need u.

be with me,

i dun wanna tear anymore.

even as i write this,

my heart cracks

burn

and cry..

Baby, help me.

You understand me.

ha...ha...ha...

2006-11-13T17:30:00.000+08:00

saKhai alive..

yet again...

wekkeke...

back again people..

wasnt MIA but was missing..

heh..

bz la...

ok man...

been well..

been good...

u expect to hear stories from me?

nah..nt this time...

well...

till now..

till next time...

bye people...

kuku..

2006-10-06T15:27:00.000+08:00

siao kia...

saKhai kia...

hey hey..

im here....yet again

who else

but its me;

'ol man!

zzzz....

boredom kills

angst erupts

get up

up from my knees

with all to crop

pitching still

cropping ill

hate it

kill it

vanish

silence in mind

..silence broke

boredom digs

KILL IT!!!

now 'kuku'

lives with me? AND u too..

next thing u noe

laughing

crying as laughing

bcos ur kuku..

siao...

dun even noe wat im writing..

eh......

wat u doing?

reading oni?

tag la!

hahs...

*siao*!!

wuaarRRggHH!!!

.......................................................

out!!

down to the down man!

2006-09-29T15:58:00.000+08:00

::__blocked running nose + sore throat

eeeeeeeee

sakit siao

im sick...

down with

running nose and sore throat

cant think

cant sleep

it hurts

down

on myself to stay

no food

no water

like slained

down
down with this sickness
it burns
it rips
it hurts

down

missing my baby sweetheart

no touch

no kisses

i need u darl!

im.. numb

to feel this 'down'

to myself so clear

i hold my breath

swallowing every moment of this

and i tear

. . . . . . khai when he is sick!

madafaka!

of myself to think..

2006-09-13T15:55:00.000+08:00

:++ kHai__

its not tat i cant

its not tat i want

its not tat i will

its not tat i need

if i can..

it would have been easy

never to worry

things are made

and us;

we are free

if i want..

it will happen

together

in time we pass

and us;

we are free

if i will..

it will be

u can have it

i can have it

and us;

we are yet

free

if i need..

its a must

it must occur

filled ourselves

the pleasure

and us;

we are

yet again

free

----------------------------

arrrggghhh!!!

i will live

to my interiums

i will live

till my end

and..

i will live..

if i may;

with You.

----------------------------

arrrggghhh!!!

:::::___saKhai

the ENEMY within

2006-09-09T21:10:00.000+08:00

wuAArggHgh!!!!!

KHAI!!!!!!!

wtf is wrong...

cheer up khai...

those friends of urs

hate ur cries.......

thx u guys..

to saKhai:

from Khairul:

--tongue tied--

the days of the past

not to be remembered

as if or to be repeated

to let it by

in the means of

time

presence

of intimidating ideas

dark thoughts

rise up

deep in my mind

the hope to kill

any circle

creeping to step

by step

to overthrow

or take mine away

Am i to burn

though i've sinned!

burnt at the stake

in this face of ^earth^

my soul

my innocent blood

flow down

of which

it can never be washed clean

... ... ... ...

to the rose,

u are to be mine

now

and forever

i sweared

--To the well of sin,I vow for

-- Love and Vengeance

i nvr want

any lies

or tantrums

of which my destructing self

can destroy our tie

then fall and

die

those are dark times

repent the dark side

relive me

free myself

free from hatred and despise

together we

entrust in this love

live our hearts desire

together

now

forever

... ... ... ...

I give my heart to you.

I want to live my dreams;

with you.

help me.

understand and

Make things rite together.

::______kHai

khai o khai

2006-08-29T22:15:00.000+08:00

eilsaKhai

missing the routines

missing my beau

missing myself

i need to find myself back

was told

"i cried alot these few days"

i noe i was

and i noe wat it caused

werk

shit werk

skool

i hate skool

pls...

baby..

i need u to console me

be close to me

i need to be alive

i need to find me

i need to be wat i was

i have to

i will be left alone

in my own shadows

running away from them

bcos i noe

im not well now

i need to find myself

for now..

dun let me be

pls baby...

i need u

to be with me.....

im not being truthful

need the courage

pls

F*CK!!!!

___khAi

i love you Diena...

"u oso"

2006-08-14T16:55:00.000+08:00

:__saKhai

I made up my mind

bcos of something which i did

and at that i was unkind

to my mum who loved me dearly

and prayed that i'll nvr repeat it

to whom i promised

never to repeat

and i asked her to promise

that she too

join me

"nvr do it again"

- "u oso"

......................

oppressed by a feeling

to feel distrust

but i noe it wasnt meant

so i let it be

and my promise i vowed

with thee

...................

a reason came

to break that promise not by me

that reason came

but i cant accept it

so it hurt

but i terribly deny

i thought

maybe

thy thinking wasnt well

thy went on

and broke a shell

i thought of it

which i can tell

thy thinking wasnt well

wasnt well enough

a calling made

i was taught a lesson

i learned and i listened

but the teacher didnt

then this calling again

for the lesson to learn

i observed

and my teacher learned

the lesson

thy thinking wasnt well

but i knew it

i could tell

and again..

i learned

and she learned

this was a lesson

pls....

I Love You..

a smell..

2006-08-08T20:48:00.000+08:00

:__saKhai--

with that weak Diorama

those crowds..

People like you..

I feel

some you live in that dream world

You despise the outside

vainly

"with" power?

--and you fear you're the next one

It's in your dream

soon

that one question

"Wooo.That guy's head was like a ball.

-----Damn..Scary..What if it was my head?"

now..

-->the weak not be weak

--> should we kill?

--> or should we leave them fear their own shadows?

Sick and Tired

of all that comments and ugly fiends

We will have our hour

We will have a time

We will have it

We will bring it down

--> those crowds

--> you crossed the line

you crossed our line

you remember our name

time runs backwards

we then erase

of names those crowds bear

EilSakhai DruMetal

** ,... **

weak Diorama

2006-08-06T20:42:00.000+08:00

++Khai__

in the wake

in crowds they came

storming at the weak

the weak then crept

crept away in silence

in silence

the weak not be weak

craving strength

gathering clouds

raging courage

in diabolics

befriending those crowds

bringing hellish backgrounds

to those among them

and realising misfits in their being

and the 'weak' celebrates nth but victory

glory in their hearts

Vengeance was brought

Revenge nvr seemed so sweet

beloved the taste

of pride

and dignity

sniffing the air

no longer weak

no longer hides

no longer RUN

as said

"Only our feet can rule Our Streets"

Live with pride my friends

Live with dignity

Never turn ur back on ur friends

and NEVER fuk around

-- live to ur words

-- im living to mine

++ _ EilSakhai _ ++

a Thought in MemoryLane ---+-<3

2006-07-30T19:50:00.000+08:00

:_____Khai

If You Love something,

Set it free..

If it comes back - it's yours..

If it doesnt - it never was...

*****

I had it all

But I let it slip away

Couldn't see I treated you wrong

Now I wander around

Feeling down and cold

Trying to believe that you're gone

Love takes time

To heal then you're hurting so much

Couldn't see that I was blind

To let you go

I can't escape the pain

Inside

'Cause love takes time

I don't wanna be here

Alone

Losing my mind

From this hollow in my heart

Suddenly I'm so incomplete

Lord I'm needing you now

Tell me how to stop the rain

Tears are falling down endlessly

Love takes time

To heal then you're hurting so much

Couldn't see that I was blind

To let you go

I can't escape the pain

Inside

'Cause love takes time

I don't wanna be here

Alone

You might say that it's over

You might say that you don't care

You might say you don't miss me

You don't need me

But I know that you do and the feel that you do

Inside

Love takes time

To heal then you're hurting so much

Couldn't see that I was blind

To let you go

I can't escape the pain

Inside

'Cause love takes time

I don't wanna be here

Alone

*****

Song by Mariah Carey : Love takes time.

At times..

2006-07-17T20:26:00.000+08:00

_Khairul

.. l-o-v-e ..

Family

Domestic Relationship

Friends

at times..

lying is the fatal move

at times..

lying is the safest move

Lies..

to my parents

no doubt

a mode that would kill

when truth reveals

Lies..

for a sake

of a friend

for things we planned

on bloodied hearts

it ends

thinking of which

myself to amend

Why..?

to lie

and later

"die"?

with hope for delightful joy

but a only for a short while

enjoying at will it was at first

walking home knowing the worst

and now

awaing a curse.

never lie..

ever..

or cry..

im learning..

and im 17..

die to lie - lie to die

a depth in my being..

..... lies

_khairul** :'(

got an 'A'

2006-07-12T22:02:00.000+08:00

*diena__*

got an 'A' for presentation.. nyahahha!!
im so happy... =P
coz i need the marks sooo desperately to make up my not-good writing paper few days ago...
hope i'll do well for the report writing as well
really need the pass n get through with this
i NEVER want to repeat the subjects..

missed the Spectculars today..
shucks!
Em sang well today..
improved lots of her so-called chinese diction
CONGRATZ EMILEE KANG!
chiayoh!
hahahaha!!

its okay i missed it...
i'm with my baby...
thanks for being with me darl for being there when i need u...

love you..
muuaacckzz!!

-diena-

presentation?

2006-07-11T01:12:00.000+08:00

*diena__*

bored..
missing you baby...

i'm going to have to make a presentation tomorrow
teenage abortion??
and i do not know if i can do it
used to have so much confidence to do things i like
now i don't know why i feel so shy to talk in front of audience...
and audience are my own classmate
oh diena... you're feeling pathetic...

-diena-

o.O

2006-07-09T20:40:00.000+08:00

_EilSakhai DruMetal

*to free or not to free*

:'( baby..
dun feel bad..i had a spoilt weekend..
with u that i needed..the time to spend..
feeling disappointed..things ran out of plan..
with u that i needed..the time to spend..

:'( sweetheart..
no,it's not ur fault..that it turned out bad for me..
not that i wanted it..and not to call it misery..
but it was as bad..bcos u,that i badly need..
and not to forget..not to call this misery..

:( honey..
though the weekend's ending in 3 hours..
but this feeling still on my nerves..
Baby, pls help me..
I just need to sleep now;
in ur bed of Flowers..

:) darling..
im doing my best..
and im gonna need ur smile..
in my heart..
ur beauty beguiles..
u make me smile..

Loving you always..

*khai..

khai!!!

2006-07-09T01:26:00.000+08:00

*diena__*

hey...
my man, my hero, my baby
darling, sweetheart, honey

update the blog!!!
why is it always ME who updates it??
readers are getting bored of only me updating...

your turn lei...
not fair know like this...

muuaacckzz!!

still must write know...

-diena-

..my uncle's wedding..

2006-07-09T01:07:00.000+08:00

*diena__*

juz got back from my uncle's wedding
a lucky year for our family this year i guess
2 weddings in the same year
my bro's and my uncle's

my sister's...
hopefully next year
i've always hope hers would come by
i wonder why myself
last time when we still live under one roof,
i always wanted her to get married so i could have the room all to myself

now that she no longer live with us
and the room is all mine..haha!
i still have the anxiousness of her getting married
weird huh?

wedding wedding wedding...
whatver!
more importantly is how i spent my day
at the wedding...

family affair...
well... more like...
THE cousin's affair
we had a great night setting people up
playing pranks on them
nyaaahaahahaha!!
evil huh? mean? hell yeah!
what we did? that's our little secret...
nyaaahaahahaha!!

karaoke nite!!
sang some songs.. like duh!
what else i'm supposed to say..

in the afternoon at the new aunt's place
the food was awesome!!!
sorry the food is what i really thought of first when it comes to this topic
our new aunt is sweet...
i really think i am going to like her...
oh teddy!
hahahhaha!!
it's a cousin thing...

well...
tomorrow..later actually
there'll be a wedding at our place in Serangoon
relatives and friends from our side will be visiting the newlyweds
hope that everything'll go on smoothly and quickly(coz i'm tired)
but i really want to enjoy it of course

shucks! i'm going to miss the 3rd placing match today
grrrr!!!
i really need to sleep coz of tomorrow
damned!
baby, u watching the match??
anyone anyone...
tag us on the scores,ya?
thanks!

-diena-

teenagers like us today..

2006-07-07T00:17:00.000+08:00

<[ - diena - ]>

i had my POM lecture this evening..
and what happened today got into my thought
got me pondering about
why teenagers like us today find it hard
to just pay some respect to an elderly?

the lecturer is old
yes, he may be long-winded
yes, all of us wants the lecture to end very quickly
so do i

but why do i find it hard for us to just sit quiet
listen to him; show respect?

i'm not saying i'm good
i'm never perfect either
just got thinking where is our sense
sense of being considerate

a feeling of disappointment got into me
when this got me pondering in my mind
but what is there that i can do?
but just hoping that humanity shows up in every single one of us..

-diena-

.Loving you.

2006-06-25T21:09:00.000+08:00

_eilSakhai

let me start.

**I locked my heart

For the precious lived in it.

It is your heart

And now the Bliss I shall create.

Hey,I'm decent

For all that I have done;

And You do know why,

Biting Your lips was no wrong,

But it is some fun! *muuaccks* =P

Now You know

That You're HoT.

Nevermind others,

I know You'd LOVE some shoTs!! =P**

heehee...

*muuuaaacckz*

2006-06-23T21:53:00.000+08:00

^diena_**

i'm feelin' terrible..
the work is taking too much toll on me..
i'm tired. shagged. exhausted.
nothing is makin' me better..

love u, baby..
needed u here.
noe ure busy, myt not be able to call.
but it's ok baby.. im doin' fyn
juz wonderin myslf why i teared wen u said,
"i'll see bout tt, baby. i'll try to call u tonyt."

i'm so sowie baby..
juz plz dun gt wuried..
i'm doin fyn over here
coolin myslf dwn

i love u baby..
i missin' u..

-muuaacckzz!-

.diena.

'THX' to CSA!!

2006-06-23T02:34:00.000+08:00

-[Diena]-

the second week of holiday is not a holiday
ive been goin to school everyday this week!
worse, early mornin to late evenin!!
thx to CSA.. u make me hate u more!
1st, the sound of your name.
then, with your contents.
now, i'm to do project on u.
tsk!
coz of u i'm shagged n sick
mentally tired n lack of sleep
f**k u!

took time off from the blurdy CSA today - well, last nyt actually
went to the SI result show with my sis n kuzzin, eem supporting emilee kang
glad, happy n relieved she got into the next round, the top 12
good luck to her... go AMUI!

but still, i can't erase CSA Project out of my mind
i hate this feeling
worries... wtf!!
haizz...
let it due soon
so i dun hv to think bout tis nimre...

khai.....
i need u here...
mmuuaaacckkz.

-Diena-

Holidays.. worries and fun.

2006-06-18T23:49:00.000+08:00

^Diena__**

1st week of holidays are over.
Augh... that was so bloody soon.
And there's still a project that is still undone.
WTF! it's due when school re-opens - 1 more week!
Worries.
Heck... it's not life without worries.

And not life without fun.
Have to get serious now,
after a fun-filled, crazy 170606 with the kuzzins.
Chill. Pool. Sleepover.
Full of activities.

Now I'm missing you, baby...
Haiz...
when will I be seeing you again??

MuUaAcKz!!!

-Diena-

2006-06-18T19:25:00.000+08:00

_eilsakhai..

living this head off..
pls..
move..
move i said..
let the beams begin.. \m/

\m/ *read between the lines..* \m/

go: http://www.pure-rock.net/gigs/gig.php?gigid=32

\m/ *muuuaaacckz!!* \m/

.Religion of steel.

2006-06-13T16:00:00.000+08:00

++ ol' Khairul ++

khairul here wants to say that.....

WAT THE FOOK!!...

i didnt go to skool tdae cos i was too lazy and that it was kinda a half day..

no class from 3 onwards..so my last lesson tdae will be CMO(T)..wat els can be more boring than this 'tihs'..nvm...skool it is.got no choice...c'mon man.khai..u noe u dislike things..get over with it
ur not supposed to be emotional over things..u gotta be controllable..wth am i talking.. -.-..

nvm...jus wanna say...

im srry sweetie..last nite was a nightmare..i dunnoe y...hope u understand me..and yah.hope jane'll understand it too... -.-

AARRGHH!!!!..... grrrrrrrrrrrr...

well....wat the hell...

RELIGION OF STEEL!!!! \m/ kcuf everything else...that means 'eagger' ..bye

EilSakhai DruMetal.. *read between the lines*

shagged

2006-06-09T20:02:00.000+08:00

*{ Diena_ }*

this week has been mentally tiring.
tests tests tests.
monday to thursday.
friday; today - migraine.
ouch!
should be enjoying myself today coz my tests are over and the holidays are back.
but i had to endure for today. but I'm okay now (don't worry about me, baby).
oh yes... i just thought of the projects!
shucks!
CSA. econs. POM.
this is driving me crazy nd this is only the 1st semester.
arghh!

but still...
thinking of my baby makes my day brighter
...Love You Baby...

-diena-

haiz..

2006-06-04T22:29:00.000+08:00

*{ Diena_ }*

why's there hatred in people?
be it to someone.something.
one knows nothing is perfect. NOTHING.
but yet one can never accept the way life is.
it's never what you want.
never the way you want it to be.
but can't we compromise?
it is one thing that one can always do,
but never choose to.
or choose not to choose.
make things best out of it.
is it stubborn not to do so?
or trying to show some points that one think is right?
but the thing is, everything has got its right and wrong. EVERYTHING.
be it something good; or bad.
haiz...
this is the way life always is.
isn't it?

just a piece of my mind.

-diena-

hmmz..

2006-06-04T22:05:00.000+08:00

-] EilSakhai DruMetal [-

the room's filled with agony sometimes...because why? because u try to sort things out when everybody's going against wat u think...dumb...maybe sumthing to say here...but nvm...nvm..

skool is just a bug in my windshield of life...nevertheless..this is Singapore..
"Education is important,is compulsory"...watever...

pls go...all of u...pls go out and have fun..have recess all day...in the end, if u dun have relevant skills for wat u gonna do in life, ur just gonna lose out...Certificates? thos are tissue papers u guys..use them to wipe ur butt wen u dun get jobs for being educated...get it? nope? nvm...

to all...i love you...

Specially love you, Diena...muuaackz!!!!

\m/ Religion of Steel \m/

outz....

-EilSakhai-

DancExplosion result!

2006-05-31T21:53:00.000+08:00

hey...its diena here...
results are out...PYRO didnt get in...
sobs...
but its ok.. we tried our best..
we'll dance again PYRO!!
love y'all!

DayOut

2006-05-28T16:13:00.000+08:00

Hey yah! diena herre....

shagged.

bored.

fuckin' bored.

had a great ball of time last Saturday (27 May) at the DancExplosion! audition... last minute training and practice - which took PYRO only a week - was very,very fast, busy and damn exhaustin!!

wad more... i was from my bro's chalet - in Aloha Loyang, Pasir Ris - to Woodlands, where we had our last practice and few rounds of rehearsals. then we had to rush to the audition - Sengkang CC. the atmosphere at the audition was really tense for me. several - a lot actually - groups/crew who've been taking part in competitions were there for the audition. and it's only my first time for an open category. i'm glad i can pull it off rather well despite being very nervous... besides, everybody has got their first times...

i enjoyed the 3-min performance alryt... it didn't really feel like a competition when we're up on stage. other groups were actually cheering us on... and we're groovin' it! hahaha!

results should be out soon! i'll update..

gtg nw... mwwaaackkz!

going on...

2006-05-27T18:20:00.000+08:00

-] EilSakhai [-

...

wat in de world...lost to the tiredness last nite tat i didnt call Diena...T_T
sorry syg...

z_Z...woke up at 9:++ am today cos i gotta do housework..then slp again (too tire) and woke up at 3pm!!! *yawnz*

so..here i am rite now..at CC..doing nothing...
Missing u Diena!.!.

--...[ The Blue ] to all the people hu noe this feeling...--

diena's 1st entry

2006-05-25T01:03:00.000+08:00

hey... it's diena here writing...
we're sharing da blog so... here's my ranting...

this week is da first week ever since da laz dae of my sec sch dae tt im so bz...
da dance explosion (a dance competition) will b held tis sat... n da 'crew' r bz rushin wit our laz min preparation. and as 4 me, i've got to juggle with this, da project meetings n tests...
yeah... the tests r cumin already... sux!

didn't turn up 4 skul todae coz dun feel lyk doin so... told my classmate tt i was sick... sowie yushu... had dance prac all da wae at innova jc - i live in d east side! - from 7 to 9. onli 2hrs... curse the journey to n fro... they're exhaustin!

well nw im bck... shagged! n nw tt ol' mama callin'...
toodles 4 nw!

wakakakaka

2006-05-24T08:35:00.000+08:00

wakakakaka....

tis for real? me blogging?

mw haha..

sumthing to do in those 'lazy-nothing-to-do' free time..

well..

outz.